Since the weather is starting to turn seasons, I'm attacking my apartment in a cleaning offensive unlike anything this apartment has ever seen.

Much like the Taliban have their "Feared Taliban Spring Offensive", I have a March tradition, the "Feared Natedawgian Spring Cleaning". And believe me, it is terrifying.

The differences between Spring Cleaning and Spring Offensives are subtle. The Taliban get a little "frisky" around this time of year, and get a hankering for their allotted seventy-two virgins in the great hereafter. Spring Cleaning also, is all about the ladies; though I prefer my ladies to be in this life, and I don't mind a girl with a bit of experience either.

Every good campaign needs an effective propaganda machine to pull the wool over the enemies eyes. My propaganda machine will be employing this technique from Lifehacker.

Back in my bachelor days, I lived on my own for a while. I hated doing dishes; however, I enjoyed eating off of plates. At some point, I realized that plates were merely platforms to hold food. I got the idea to place plastic wrap over plates or any other hard surface to recreate a clean plate. So, if you don't want to do the dishes any more, get some microwaveable plastic wrap and place it over your plate. When you're done eating, throw out or recycle your plastic wrap.

Battle updates may or may not be available in the comments.

Labels: Afghanistan, etc